Supporting a parent with dementia can be a challenging task. Addressing their changing needs can be confusing, but you still want to be there for them no matter what. One effective way to support an aging parent is by visiting and talking with them frequently. Yet, you might also wonder, can frequent visits also be a source of stress?
The short answer is yes, it’s possible to visit a parent with dementia too much. While regular visits can be beneficial, overly frequent or lengthy visits may lead to agitation or stress for your loved one. Striking a balance is key—not only for their emotional and cognitive well-being but also for maintaining the quality of your relationship.
Understanding Dementia & Its Progression
Dementia is a term for a group of neurological disorders that progressively impair memory, thinking, and behavior, impacting the ability to perform everyday activities. Alzheimer’s disease accounts for nearly 80% of dementia cases, but other types, like vascular dementia or Lewy body dementia, also exist and have unique characteristics.
To better tailor your visits, it’s helpful to understand the stage of your parent’s dementia. Dementia generally progresses through three main stages, each with different care and emotional needs.
1. Early Stage
Memory lapses are mild, and your parent may still maintain their independence. Visits are often joyful and help maintain normalcy in their daily routine.
2. Middle Stage
Cognitive decline becomes more obvious, and help with daily tasks may be required. Social interactions can be both stimulating and comforting when done thoughtfully.
3. Late Stage
Comprehensive care is needed as speech, mobility, and self-care skills diminish. Visits during this stage should focus on offering a sense of calm and reassurance.
Assessing the stage your parent is in can help you structure your interactions in ways that best meet their needs and comfort.
Why Visits are Important for Parents with Dementia
Regular visits from loved ones can have profound benefits for those living with dementia, providing emotional comfort and cognitive engagement.
Boosting Mood & Emotional Well-being
Frequent visits create a sense of familiarity, which is invaluable for someone whose reality may often feel confusing or disorienting. Your presence can reduce loneliness and feelings of isolation, which, studies show, may slow the progression of dementia.
Enhancing Cognitive Function
Spending time engaging in conversations or activities provides much-needed mental stimulation. Even something as small as sharing a story or flipping through old photo albums can help preserve cognitive function for longer.
Signs You May Be Visiting Too Much
While regular visits are important, you should also be able to recognize when they might become overwhelming for your parent. Every person is different, and their individual reactions are the best indicators of whether your visits are positively impacting them.
How Stress or Fatigue May Present
Watch for signs such as:
- Agitation: Increased irritability or confusion during or after visits.
- Withdrawal: Lack of engagement or enthusiasm when you’re present.
- Fatigue: Appearing overly tired or needing extra time to recover after interactions.
If these behaviors occur, it may be time to shorten your visits, reduce their frequency, or reassess your approach.
Finding the Right Balance
There’s no one-size-fits-all solution when it comes to visiting a parent with dementia. However, there are strategies to help you find the balance that works best for you both.
Lean on the Care Team
If your parent is in a memory care community, their caregivers are invaluable allies. Caregivers can provide feedback on how your visits affect your parent’s mood or energy levels, and help you determine the most beneficial schedule.
Collaborate with Family
Divide the responsibility by coordinating visits among family members. This ensures that your parent experiences meaningful interactions without being overstimulated. It also helps avoid caregiver burnout for you and your relatives.
Quality Over Quantity
Rather than focusing on how often you’re visiting, prioritize the quality of your time together. Thoughtful interactions, like a short walk or singing their favorite songs, may be more impactful than lengthy visits that leave them feeling worn out.
Staying Connected Beyond Visits
When in-person visits aren’t feasible or advisable, there are other ways to maintain a meaningful connection with your parent.
Use Technology
Video calls or phone calls can bridge the gap when you’re unable to visit. Choose a format that feels familiar and comfortable for your parent.
Creative Alternatives
Consider sending letters, care packages, or a scrapbook of shared memories. These sentimental gestures can remind them of your bond even when you can’t be physically present.
Supporting You & Your Loved One at Every Stage
Balancing visits to a parent with dementia isn’t always easy, but with patience, flexibility, and the right resources, it’s possible to provide meaningful support while respecting your parent’s unique needs. At All American Assisted Living at Raynham, our compassionate staff understands the complexities of dementia care. We work closely with families to enhance the quality of life for residents while offering valuable guidance and support. Book a tour of our community today to see if our community is right for you or your loved one’s needs.
